Sunday, January 12, 2014

Something I Miss

Yesterday was a good day. It was Saturday, things got done, errands were run, hopefully fun was had by all. But it was different than the typical Saturday that I've grown to love. In years past Ken and I would run errands together. I like being together, I love Ken and it might be odd, but I find it calming just to be with him, to be near him. I miss him when he's gone. He's gone a lot during the work week, because, well, he's at work. And so on the weekends it's nice for us all, the whole family, to be together.

Before we had children there was rarely a time when we would go shopping or run errands without each other. And even when our first two boys joined our family, we just dragged them along with us. Our oldest was born right as winter turned to spring (seriously, like with in minutes of the actually change- I just realized that, it's kind of awesome, just like that sweet little boy is!) and there really wasn't too much fear in my mind about him being around large crowds. We didn't take him to church for about a month, but if we needed to go to the store, we just packed him up in his car seat and went to the store. There wasn't much thought put into it, we just did it. It was pretty much the same with our second boy- he was born smack dab in the middle of summer when there isn't much fear of anything, just glorious warm days and lots of fun to be had out and about as a family. And so, we just added him to our merry band of errand runners and off we would go, together.

And that is what I miss. I miss being together. Someday, when it's warm, (oh, how I miss the warmth) when the stupid viruses have mostly gone into hiding and when our sweet little baby has a more regular type of sleeping schedule, we will once again be able to run errands together. Someday. But why is this time, adding this child, so different? I thought about that yesterday while I was all alone, running my errands, and here is what I came up with.

1-She's practically perfect in every way! Meaning, She sleeps a lot, and she's willing to sleep in her bed! And so I want her to do that. Her brothers were not so good at that, in fact, I would often time the running of errands for right after they had eaten or right when I expected that they would be tired, so that I could get them to sleep during the car ride to wherever we needed to go. It worked, they got the sleep they needed, and eventually we were able to convince them that sleeping in their beds for naps was a good thing, but it seriously took weeks, if not months, to do that. This sweet girl likes her bed, she likes our bed, she likes sleeping IN A BED and I love that about her, but it makes it hard to take her places. And so we will wait.

2- It's the DEAD OF WINTER, it's cold and kind of dangerous out there. Why risk it?

3- This Flu season seems to be a bad one. I say that mostly because I've seen stories about it on the news AND for some reason that I still don't understand- I got the flu, so the virus MUST be running rampant out there, just waiting to infect innocent little babies. That, coupled with the fact that I know several mothers of children who've had long term issues because they contracted RSV as babies, makes me really really want to keep my baby safe and free from illness. So, we just don't take her out and about like we did with our other babies.

And that is why we divide and conquer, everything gets done and the kids all get special time alone with one of their parents, either because they are going out on an errand run or they are staying home with Mom or Dad and Baby Sister- who is probably sleeping. But Divide and Together are like oil and water, they just don't mix well. They are different.

Eventually, things will get back to normal, and I will shout HALLELUJAH! Until then, I guess I'll just try my best to enjoy the moments. As it was, yesterday, I went to Ikea, all by myself, and picked out a new duvet cover for my bed. Then I went to the Pharmacy- where, on my 3rd attempt, I was able to pick up a prescription- more on that will probably come later. Finally, I went to the grocery store, once again, all by myself. Then I came home, and my family was, once again, together :)

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