Monday, November 23, 2009

Sickeys- It should be our new last name.

What a week we have had. A couple of weeks ago I whined about being stuck at home, quarantined, and possibly even sick with the swine flu. Well, I was never quite sure if we actually got it. Little J had a low grade fever for about 5 days, at times he was slightly fussy, but mostly he was just J with a fever. He could have been teething- we have been dealing with the pending eruption of the eye teeth (is that how you spell eye in those teeth? You know, the K9's, or as I have decided, his Vampire Teeth) for a month or two already- so it is hard to tell if he was sick or not. Well I decided that he was better and that he needed to re-learn how to get back to sleep in the middle of the night without Mommy intervention. After all, Mommy needs to sleep at night too.

I think there are a lot of Mom's out there like me, I can not stand to hear my baby cry, let alone SCREAM, when I know the reason he is crying is because he wants me. But I also know that SLEEP is very important and very underrated and so I am having to learn how to deal with letting my baby cry. The Wheeler family is big on White Noise and their favorite kind of White Noise if from a Box Fan. So each night there is a box fan in each bedroom, turned to the highest setting possible. I also place a pillow on top of my head to muffle any other noise that my Mommy ears can pick up. The first couple nights were really hard. I could still hear him, and worse I could hear phantom crying- I hate phantom crying! (Does anyone else hear babies crying when they aren't?) But finally, FINALLY we started to get full nights of sleep again. Then on Wednesday morning I woke up around 2 and I couldn't go back to sleep, all seemed quiet in the house and so I wandered downstairs and watched the History Channel until I was tired again and then slept on the couch for a few hours. Ken came to see me before he left for work and about an hour after that I went to get J up for the day.

As I entered his room I could smell it. Vomit. Yuck. I am not good with Vomit, in fact I call myself a sympathetic vomiter, because usually just the smell or sound of it is enough to get me to join in the Non-Fun. Luckily some sort of Mommy Override kicked in and I was able to help my sick little baby all day with out being "Overly Sympathetic". The poor baby had a fever as well and so he was super cuddly all day long. He and I both had to change our clothes a few times. I did 4 loads of laundry and discovered that I can cover my couch in blankets and protect it from the yuckiness....I didn't think about covering the carpet until it was too late.

It must have been a 24 hour virus, because by 2 am the next morning he was hungry. How do I know? Well he was sick, so I raised my ban on Mommy visits in the middle of the night and when he cried I went to comfort him. As he lay on the changing table I noticed that he was signing. "Milk" he said. "You want some Milk?" I asked "Milk, Milk, Water." came the signed reply. "OK, do you want Milk or Water?" "Food, More Food, Milk, Water, More Food" I am pretty sure there were a couple of "!" in there too. Those little hands were flying and I was laughing. So we got the new diaper and then took a Sippy full of milk down stairs. He had been so forceful about his need for Milk, Water and Food, but in the end he only drank about a 6th of the milk then he turned and put his head on my shoulder. We sat together like that for a few minutes and then I took him back to bed. I went to bed smiling, envisioning those little hands telling me exactly what he wanted. "Food, More Food"

Thursday was a pretty normal day- No Vomit- that is all I really cared about.

Friday wasn't quite as normal. I made a decision about my physical well being that day. My knee has been hurting me the past couple of weeks and I decided that the wait and see period probably needed to come to an end. I needed to make a choice. The first choice I made was that I would have to stop running for a while, and so on Friday I knee still hurt. I decided that I needed knew shoes, maybe that would help, after all my shoes are too old and they needed to be replaced anyway. So I did some research online and after Ken got home from work we took a shopping trip so I could try on some new running shoes. We hit two or three stores and then it was time for dinner. Luckily there was a Wendy's nearby and so we had a Value Menu Meal.

About an hour after eating, I started to feel sick. I knew then that I should have taken my Chicken Sandwich back when, after taking my first bite, I felt that it wasn't hot enough. So I had what I believe was a very cleansing case of Food Poisoning. No fever, just aches and pains and Non-Sympathetic Grossness! Yuck. I HATE being sick. Luckily Ken was there to make sure I was OK as I sat on the bathroom floor in the middle of the night. On the bright side on Saturday afternoon I weighed 3.2 pounds less than I had on Friday. Too bad that on Sunday I gained 2 of those pounds back, Food, it will do that too you. Anyway, I am feeling fine now.

Ken had taken a bite of my sandwich and all through the day on Saturday he was fine, but when the night came he started having similar symptoms, Nausea, Aches and Pains. Unfortunately for Ken the fan was on High and I had a pillow over my head, so I didn't hear him when he was awake in the middle of the night hoping for an end to the sickness....Sorry Sweetie.

We were both pretty tired from the week of wretchedness at our house and so last night we went to bed at 9:30. This morning I woke up at 5:15! Bright Eyed, and if I had a tail I am sure it would have been bushy. We are happy to be healthy again. Here hoping that we stay that way.

And finally, I want to update you on my exercise and weight loss...After my venting email my Brother in Law, Lets call him T-Dawg, or maybe Mr. Soprano, (hmmm you know who you are, what do you want to be called?) anyway, he sent me a message telling me that he understood where I was coming from and that he was trying to get in better shape- he doesn't need to lose weight, just stay healthy. He invited me to be his Workout Buddy- well his words were "Let's follow up with each other" but that, to me, means that we are Buddies. So anyway, it has been really nice. I always tell Ken when I work out and he always smiles and tells me I am doing a good job, but when I don't workout, Ken doesn't push the subject. But now I have someone who will push me, and I can push him. The fact that we are separated by 500 miles or so will keep us from physically hurting each other if we slack off too much. But so far both of us have done really good I think. So Thanks Workout Buddy, Your Great!

Hopefully I will have new shoes soon, and a few weeks of walking will be good for me. I also need to do more and better stretching exercises, so if anyone has some favorites, let me know. Next month I am going to give running, in my new shoes, a try and if my knee still hurts I will go see a Sports Medicine Doctor. Wish me luck.

Friday, November 13, 2009

St George- To Good not to Share!

What do you do when you are stuck in the car with your Mom (who is sleeping) and your Dad (who is listening to French Pop Music)? Well, you sick your fingers in your ears of course! I just had to share that part....but on to the rest of the story.
In the middle of October we took a trip to St. George. And Boy, Oh Boy, did we enjoy it. We stayed at the Worldmark St. George Resort.

We had planned to go to Branson this summer for the Wheeler Family Reunion (Ken's Grandfathers decedents) and we saved up our vacation credits for 3 years so that we could get a really nice, really big Condo at the resort in Branson Missouri. We even had a condo booked and then found out that no one else from Ken's family was planning on attending the reunion. So we cancelled- but I desperately needed to go somewhere and we needed to use a good portion of our credits or else we would lose them. So I booked us the Presidential Suite in St George. When we checked in the clerk said "Oh, You have the Fun Room!" and it just got better from there.

Our Suite was on the 4th floor one of the buildings, we had the entire floor to ourselves, 3 bedrooms (two of which were masters), 4 baths (did I mention that the two master suits had SWEET Master Baths too- I love huge jetted tubs!), our own private deck (with our own private hot tub and really nice BBQ Grill, the deck ran almost the entire length of the suite) and a great room and kitchen that were, well, more like an Awesome Room- if there were such things as Awesome Rooms in homes.
This is the view from the TV area of the Kitchen- Granite counter tops and all.

This is the view from the Kitchen to the TV Area, you can't see the comfy leather couches.

Our Friends the Westovers came down to St. George with us too. Here are some of the fun things we did.
We went to In & Out Burger and J discovered a love of Ketchup and French Fries

And he also discovered Chocolate Shakes
We went to Snow Canyon where we discovered that J is just a little too young to hike.... but his was cute enough that he entertained the other groups of hikers as he ran around and tried to climb on the rocks.
OK, this next part is really cool- at least I think it is cool. I think I heard that Snow Canyon because of those mountains in the distance- for some odd reason, they are White, like Snow. In the fore ground you can see the typical red rock of Southern Utah. And in between the White rocks and the Red rocks is a Lava Flow!!!! LAVA! I think that is cool, I want to go back to Snow Canyon someday.
We then went to the Sand Dunes
Ken and I made sure that we shook the sand out of our shoes before we left Snow Canyon, but we forgot to do the same for J's shoes...oops. J was able to smuggle quite a bit of Red Sand back to our Condo. (And, check out that tile inlay in our entryway- BEAUTIFUL! I miss that place)
We figured that there was no better way to cool off after our morning at Snow Canyon, than spending some time in the Pool, I loved the Waterfall.
Ken and J spent some time in the Baby Pool too.
After the pool, we put J back in his pajamas and put him down for a nap. He woke up screaming after about 90 minutes, not the best nap but long enough, we thought. So we let the boy get up, he quickly fell asleep on my stomach......and proceeded to sleep for another 2 hours.
We had a relaxing and wonderful trip. Ken even thinks he might like going back to St. George someday, if we can get the Presidential Suite that is......

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

The Waiting Game

You would think I would be used to it by now. Waiting. I've been doing it my whole life.

As a Child I waited for summer. When summer was over I waited for Christmas and after Christmas I waited for my Birthday. Junior High came and I waited for boys to notice me. High School came and I waited for it to be over. I waited for my First Date and my First Kiss. I waited for my real life to start. I eventually found myself waiting to fall in Love and waiting to get Married, which then led to waiting for children to come......

I really, really dislike waiting.

I think it is hitting me hard today. I am feeling a little lonely because I and many other members of my extended family are under a quasi-self imposed quarantine for a couple of days. On of the cousins has the Swine Flu and so in order to be good neighbors we are staying inside just in case we have it too. In another 24 hours we will know if we do or don't and then we can get on with our lives, but for now we are waiting.

I once again allowed myself to believe that I could get pregnant, and this morning I took a test, I was wrong. Within an hour or two of the negative test my tummy started to hurt- it was mocking me, telling me I would have to continue waiting. I live in the wrong place for someone who is forced to wait. There are too many incredibly fertile 24 year old women around here, maybe we should move to an area with a lot of retirees or something. Maybe that would help me forget the fact that I am still waiting. I have a near perfect son, at least in my eyes he is near perfection, some of his Aunts might disagree, but he is perfect for me. But with all the little tiny babies around I can't help but want my own tiny one too. Little J even seems to love the babies. And so I wait. It was worth the wait with J.

I am also waiting for my desire and my energy level to catch up with my dreams. I dream of being healthier. I dream of losing 45 more pounds. I have lost 15 yeah for me! but I haven't done anything but maintain for a month or more. Maintaining is good, but not when your goal is to lose. I have been worried this month about weight loss. As I said, I had allowed myself to believe that I could be pregnant and so I was wondering what my Doctor would say about trying to gain as little as possible or even trying to lose weight (eating good, healthy foods- getting enough calories- exercising) during pregnancy.

It is amazing how expressing these things is suddenly putting some things in perspective for me.
Let me share.

When we were trying to get pregnant in 2006 I received a very specific answer to a prayer. My question was, When, when will I be blessed with a child? The answer was June. I of course thought- great it is May, we will get pregnant next month. Well we didn't get pregnant. I then thought how silly I was, June would be our due date- of course- we would get pregnant in September. Well, September came and went and we had no baby. A year went by and in July of 2007 I found out I was pregnant- we had conceived in June! My Prayer had been answered and I had been blessed, I just had to wait for it. Did I say I don't like waiting.

So anyway, I have once again been asking that question of God. When. I beg. I plead. I haven't had the same type of answer, but I have had two very distinct impressions. The first being that I do need to lose weight. I feel that my body doesn't quite work right and it would work much better if it were in better shape- that should be enough to get me on that treadmill everyday don't you think. The second impression was that little J would be a wonderful only child, I would not lack for love if he were my only one. As I have been typing away today those two impressions came back to me and kind of wrapped themselves around me. They have brought me comfort and kind of made me sad all at the same time.

I think- now remember the story about June- when I decided what it meant I was wrong both times, so chances are I am wrong with this too- but anyway, I think that God has given me something to do while I wait, which is get healthy, get in shape, get ready for what is coming next. If I can do it, then maybe a new child will come into our family- maybe that child will need a mother who is strong and at her peak physically, maybe I will need to be really strong.But if it doesn't work out that way, if we are blessed to have only One Amazingly Fantastic Child, he will be enough, he will be able to give this Mother all the baby love she needs.

Speaking of which, that baby just woke up, guess I am done waiting for nap time to be over.