All By Myself....

Ken didn't have much time off after J was born. I was freaked out, of course, and tired and that first week we were home my Mom came and helped out in the mornings so that I could rest. This was very necessary because little J didn't realize he needed to sleep. Silly J.

This time Ken was able to take Paternity Leave, and he was home for 3 weeks! It was blissful, but I think I should have taken more advantage of the opportunity to nap while he was here, because now I am very tired, and I am all by myself with two very sweet boys. I didn't feel as much need to nap while Ken was here with us because he helped out with the baby at night, so I could get more sleep. Monday night I took care of the baby all by myself, this wouldn't be so bad, but I, myself, had a bad nights sleep, I couldn't get my brain to turn off when it needed too, and I lost at least 1 precious hour of sleep worrying about the carpet- that is right, my dirty carpet kept me awake.

That loss of sleep, combined with the fact that this sweet little guy.....

sleeps for 4 hours between 8 and midnight, and then is up every 3 hours (which includes the time it takes to eat and return to sleep) made for one very tired and pretty scared Mom when Dad left for work yesterday morning. Prayers were said and tears, many tears, were shed and I walked out into the unknown. Luckily for me, God Lives, and he heard those prayers and sent miracles! Here is our story.

Ken left for work around 6:30, I had been up with Billy for almost an hour, and I got him to go to sleep as soon as I possibly could (this was Miracle #1 because he slept for almost 2 hours) then I was able to say my personal prayers, read my scriptures and close my eyes for 15-20 minutes before J woke up.

I started making breakfast and thought I would do the dishes while my eggs cooked. For some reason I had to leave the kitchen, upon my return I found J making his breakfast, or so he thought. He had taken a bowl out of the dishwasher- it was the bowl that we usually use to scramble our eggs- and he had taken the eggs out of the refrigerator, he looked at me and smiled and said "Eggies, Yum!" at which point I told him that yes, eggs were yummy but he wasn't allowed to make them himself and I took the eggs away. He was soon pacified with a portion of my eggs that had just finished cooking. After breakfast I continued to do the dished and J played in the front room, I could hear him playing with the phone but I didn't think he could actually call anyone. After all he usually hits the "END" button after every 2 or 3 other buttons he pushes. Well, I was wrong. A few minutes later Ken called from work to tell me that he had just received a call from one of the people he carpools with, apparently J had managed to make a call- to the last person who had called us- and it just so happened to be Ken's carpool buddy. I am sure there were plenty of laughs about that at CHG. I was able to laugh about it too. It was right about this time that Baby B woke up. With a SNOTTY NOSE!

Miracle #2- I was actually able to use the nose bulb thing- and the baby wasn't congested the rest of the day!

I got J settled downstairs, watching episode after episode of Little Einsteins and I was able to get the baby fed, changed, cuddled and down for his second nap by 10, this was Miracle #3 because the baby had not gone down for 2 naps so easily since he got over his newborn sleepiness. And it was perfect timing because within the next hour J would appear to test my faith and patience in a big way.

I heard him calling for me, "Mom, I need help!" he said. "Help with what?" I asked as I walked toward the stairs, he came around the corner at the bottom of the stairs, COMPLETELY NAKED. "Poop, need wipes" he said. I felt calm, in fact I think I even giggled a little, and J and I worked together to get him cleaned up and then we had some one on one time. I think this was Miracle #4. Little J needed some time just with Mommy. We read books. One of J's current favorites is "If you give a Moose a Muffin", we read that one 3 times and then J asked for a muffin, and then another, and then another.

It wasn't too long before the baby woke up. We all had lunch and I marveled that I had made it through so much of the day with out any major frustrations or crying spells. After Lunch, J took some pictures, this one was actually pretty good.
I thought I might actually get a nap, but I was wrong, as soon as I got J down for his afternoon nap, baby B woke up from a nap and wanted to be held, I find it hard to sleep while holding a baby. It wasn't too long after that that Ken came home. The evening progressed nicely and we were able to get both the boys down for the night.
Don't they look happy? J loves to have kisses from "buba" as part of his bedtime routine. I think they are the sweetest brothers I have ever seen.

I slept better last night- probably from exhaustion. Today has been good, I think I can handle this. I don't expect to ever feel like a perfect mother, but yesterday I felt competent, and that was Miracle #5.