Monday, February 3, 2014

A Proverb Comes to Mind

Parts of this post have been rattling around in my brain for close to a week now. I started writing it last Friday and I was a few paragraphs in when Ken called to tell me that he had been invited to his company's Presidents Club- which this year is a 5 day 4 night trip to Puerto Rico. I quickly switched gears from writing a blog post to finding places for my children to stay while Ken and I take a very exciting and hopefully restful trip! We are still very excited about the trip, but plans for the kids are pretty much taken care of and I now feel ready to finish this post. Soooooooo, without further ado........

I like to watch the news, both local and national news. I like to hear about what is going on all over the world. This is something I've enjoyed doing since I was in middle school. I give the credit to a social studies teacher who would often assign us to watch the news AND to my Father, who could often be found watching it, which made it easy for me to do that part of my homework.

Earlier this week I saw a news story about a short blog post that talked about how "average" being a wife and mother is, and how it shouldn't be celebrated. Apparently, the short 450 word post was causing quite a buzz online. Later that day a friend shared a rebuttal to that post, which I read and enjoyed, I then read the original post and a few more rebuttals. I didn't really agree with what the original post had to say. It made me wonder just a little bit more about the state of our world, but it didn't make me question or even feel bad about my own choices.

It's true, I have chosen to be a Wife and a Mother and my entire life may go completely unnoticed by 99.99999999%  of the world but the fact that I haven't done anything that some people might consider exceptional, well that really doesn't bother me. 

This morning (well, Friday morning) I read another blog post. I liked it, and after I finished reading, this thought popped into my head, "her children shall rise up and call her blessed". I knew there was something like that in the scriptures and I found it in Proverbs. Proverbs 31:28 in the King James Version of the Bible says "Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her." This made me smile because that is what I'm hoping for, that would be the "exceptional" that I'm working towards. And there have been moments in my life when I've seen little glimpses of this. Mostly from Ken, he's good with words of affirmation. The jury is still out when it comes to whether or not my children will consider my mothering to be one of their greatest blessings.

At this point my thoughts turned to my own mother, who my sisters and I know to be an Angel who has been allowed to live among us here on earth. ( It was right here, at this point in my thought process that I got the call from Ken and my first call was to my Mother. I hoped to be able to have my older boys spend most of the time that Ken and I are away with one of my sisters, so that they could play with cousins who are close to their ages. But my sweet baby will be less than 4 months old and my Mother's home is the place I would be most comfortable leaving her. My mother has been, well, lets say, overrun by grandchildren recently......and that is one of the reasons why I kind of let this blog post sit on the shelf for a few days, I didn't want her to feel like I was trying to "butter her up" because I really feel this way......really!) I'm not saying that she is perfect, but she was and is the perfect Mother for me. And now, I'd like to take this moment, to take a stand here on the internet, to arise, and call my Mother Blessed! I hope that I can be as good of a Mommy as she was and is.

The other day I was holding my sweet baby, it was sometime between 5 and 7 in the morning and she had just finished a bottle and was asleep in my arms. She was so beautiful. I loved her so much that my heart hurt, it felt like it could burst, it was a wonderful feeling. I hoped that she would someday be able to understand how beautiful she is, and how very much I love her, but I knew that I would never, ever in a million lifetimes, have sufficient words to explain those things too her. How could I ever help her understand how precious she is? And I started to cry when I realized that I was once my mothers baby, that she had probably held me in her arms and felt the same hopes and fears. And I realized that all I really had to do was love her and show her by being there for her, like my Mother has been for me.

And so that is the life I choose. I choose to be at home with my children, I choose to try (most days) to be a better homemaker than I naturally am (I'm still kind of waiting for those kind little forest creatures to show up, they never do......but in the back of my mind I hope they will and when they do show up there will be cleaning ready and waiting for them!), I choose to cuddle with my sweet little 3 year old, and read him the same book over and over and over again. I choose to be there when my 5 year old gets home from school so that I can ask him about his day and listen as he tells me about "centers" and recess and the fun things his teacher said and did. I choose to talk to my sweet baby and hold her and carry her around. I choose to teach my children about God and how much he loves them. I'm rewarded for all these choices, and so many more, each day. My reward is found in the laughter of my boys as they play and the fact that when they are sad or hurt they come running, looking for me, because my hugs and kisses can heal them. I'm rewarded by the smile of my baby girl and the gleam in her eyes when I'm changing what seems like the millionth diaper of the day. There are too many little rewards to count.

(those sweet eyes!)
I'm not doing everything right, but I'm doing the best I can with what I have, and what I have is a heart full of love and faith that I'm doing something great. I'm helping to mold my beautiful children in to wonderful people, and I really don't think I could ever do anything more exceptional than that, even if no one outside my little family ever noticed. My hope is that someday, my children will be grateful that I loved them enough to be at home with them. This is the life I've chosen and it is a beautiful life, the perfect life for me.

1 comment:

Lisha said...

You're a great lady Kate!